


I moved to a new place and then my boyfriend was a vampire !

by Carry692, kimmu, ranchboiii



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: M/M, Sheith Big Meme 2019, Twilight Parody, hahahaha
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-22
Updated: 2019-04-22
Packaged: 2020-01-23 22:24:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 4,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18559105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Carry692/pseuds/Carry692, https://archiveofourown.org/users/kimmu/pseuds/kimmu, https://archiveofourown.org/users/ranchboiii/pseuds/ranchboiii
Summary: Just your average Twilight AU. Written for theSheith Big Meme event!





	1. You’re sending me where?!?

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. This is dedicated to my incredibly wonderful mememates, [Hemsbutt](https://twitter.com/hemsbutt) and [Carry692](https://twitter.com/Carry6921) !!!!  
> 2\. You bet your bottom i was part of the demographic that faithfully read Twilight in middle school  
> 3\. i completely forgot that Edward could read minds. bUt i also think that part of the story was weird so i exempt it from here  
> 4\. i also tried to omit other creepy aspects about twilight because let’s be frank: there are TOO MANY! Wee woo!! Stink Police!!!! anywho i just wanted to make this as fluffy and meme-y as possible. Enter YA Sheith  
> 5\. prepare to experience my middle school fanfiction writing style. don’t worry, i had a quizilla account for six years; i remember the drill.

All his life, Keith has known only the dry, hot deserts of Arizona. It’s on his 17th birthday when that all gets taken away from him.

“Honey you know I love you but you simply cannot live by yourself here in Arizona while I’m away on international travel for work. Your father called to let me know that the company is willing to rent him the house if he stays in Washington instead of coming back home here, so I’m sending you up there to live with him.”

“You’re sending me where?!? Washington?!? Are you serious?” Keith asks, flabbergasted and taken aback like a car that’s rapidly backed up several feet. “It’s my senior year! Mom!”

But his mother Krolia possesses that immutable matriarchal puissance that Keith simply cannot refuse. He packs his suitcases and goes to the airport the next day.


	2. Whatever

It’s raining when he gets there. From the airport where his dad came to pick him up, all the way to the small town where his father is living cheaply and commuting to the hangar everyday, the rain falls in phases like the moon, waxing and waning in its volume. Sometimes it spits monotonously. Sometimes it pours monotonously. But most of the time, it just drizzles monotonously. At night, it even gets cold enough to freeze over in some places. Ice! Keith can’t believe it.

In his messenger bag, Keith cradles the precious D vitamins his few but precious friends sent him away with as a parting gift. They rattle like empty promises in their inconspicuous green bottle. The green bottle actually kind of reminds him of the trees he’s seeing, though, towering hemlocks and firs who wear their evergreen coats are like crisp uniforms, boasting the staying power of Washington’s proud army of coniferous trees. Somehow, he feels instantly compelled to purchase a 1000ml Hydro Flask and an Eno hammock, also green.

“Sorry, son,” apologizes his father sadly. “I know how hard it is to get moved around, especially during pivotal points in your life like senior year. I hope you’ll find it in you to forgive us someday.”

“Yeah right. Whatever,” Keith says. “Probably. I guess.” He does love his parents, he does. This is just absolutely out of the question horrible and terrible.


	3. First Day of School

It’s the first day of school and the only redeeming factor is that Keith gets to drive a car. His own car. His first car. It’s clunky, but it’s unique and cool in a underground sort of way. And it’s not a car but a truck.

He skids into the parking lot like he’s got something to prove and swings into a random parking spot with accurate precision. When he gets out of the car, it starts raining.

Stopping by the front office to introduce himself and get his schedule, he shakes hands with the office ladies and School Principal Sanda, a woman in her fifties with an austere haircut and pristine suit. On her lapel is a pin of the school’s mascot, some sort of locally inspired rodent. A martin, maybe. Or marmot? To be honest, Keith doesn’t know the difference.

She offers to escort him to his first period science class which is actually pretty nice, or it would be if Keith wanted the attention. He’d rather go unseen, like a discreet ninja. However, he admittedly doesn’t know his way around the school quite yet and supposes he would rather be escorted than lost.

When they arrive at the specific classroom in the designated hall, the principal holds open the door for Keith and announces his arrival and recent transfer to the high school from the distant badlands of Arizona. “Let’s give Keith a warm Washington welcome!”

Oddly enough, some of the students clap at Keith’s arrival, others give a tacit nod, others pay no attention at all. And then.

And then.

The arguably hottest man Keith has ever seen in his life ( _in his LIFE_ ), is sitting at a desk with an empty chair next to it. He gives him a gentle smile and then an aborted wave as his countenance shifts to a melange of horrified disgust and repulsion.

“You can take the open seat next to Shiro!” The science teacher offers, bidding his thanks and farewell to Principal Sanda. He gestures to the disgusted beautiful creature that Keith just witnessed.

“Sorry,” Keith says, taking his place next to the man who is so hot and also so repulsed by him and his apparent southwestern stench. Keith knows he isn’t the most attractive person in the universe but even this is a little offensive. “I’m Keith.”

“Shiro,” Shiro says. As he does, he attempts to subtly cover his nose with his arm, a rippling bicep tempting Keith’s attention away from the offensive gesture. The bulge of his muscles lead his eyes up to his chiseled jaw, straight nose. His herculean stature is truthfully unrealistic in the body of a high schooler but alas, Keith is not complaining. But he is still sort of offended. He gives his armpits a cursory sniff to see if he’s sweating nervously but he still smells winterfresh like his dad’s deodorant that he stole because he accidentally forgot it while packing to come to Washington from Arizona which just happened yesterday.

“I can sit somewhere else if you like,” he offers, deciding to take the high road.

“No, it’s fine,” Shiro says too quickly, pulling away his hand from his face and instead resting a fist that clenches and unclenches on the desk. His expression relaxes fractionally and the shadow of a smile makes an appearance. “Let’s work on this project.”

 

[](https://ibb.co/N3xcBsQ)


	4. Oh my god I almost Died!

By the end of an unorthodox science class, Keith is actually sort of confident that he’s made a friend in the hottest guy alive in spite of thinking he smells terrible. He is of a kind and gentle disposition despite their rough start, and seems to be able to ignore Keith’s stench of Arizona sunshine and new student status.

He bids him farewell as the bell rings and Shiro even offers to walk Keith to his next class. It’s very kind so Keith says yes. He has always gotten “attention” from girls as his mom would say, so it’s finally refreshing to get the same “attention” from a handsome guy like Shiro. It validates Keith’s identity that he still keeps relatively on the down low. But maybe Washington is different from Arizona in that way.

The day goes by and he doesn’t have any other classes with Shiro. The 6th period bell rings and he drives his truck home, greets his dad a little more cheerily than the day before.

“Good first day of school?” He asks, hopeful.

“More or less,” Keith says, buttering a piece of toast and heading upstairs to do homework. “Still adjusting but. People seem nice here.”

“They are,” his dad reassures him. “Love you, son.”

“You too dad.”

Keith goes to sleep and dreams of open meadows, green with grass and green with lichen and green with tall, tall trees.

*

The next morning, the rain has been traded out for a frigid wind that seems to blow right through Keith’s bones. Unequipped for such weather, he steals a coat from his dad’s closet and heads to school slowly and carefully on his father’s recommendation.

He makes it to the school without incident, although a patch of ice near the hilly entrance nearly stops his progress. But Keith is an excellent driver so it’s no problem. He parks, shrugs on his backpack, locks up the truck, and starts to head toward the big school.

Up ahead, he sees Shiro walking toward the parking lot, arguably the wrong direction for this time of day. Maybe he forgot something in his car? Either way, Keith raises his arms to give a cordial wave, making eye contact with a smiling Shiro, but the telltale sound of screeching tires wipes the friendliness from his face and hand. Keith turns to look behind him, and sure enough there is a car sliding toward him faster than he can really keep track of. He screws his eyes shut on instinct.

And opens them after nothing happens.

Or. Well. Something did happen. But he’s okay. He’s okay.

He feels a large, muscular arm flex around his waist. He’s definitely okay.

Shiro is cradling him close to his own body, his other arm propped up against the car that had been headed for Keith’s body, the warped metal of the bumper suggesting that Shiro had stopped the car himself. But how? Shiro had been on the other side of the parking lot, at least fifty feet away. Not to mention that while totally, utterly, sincerely and truly ripped, no regular high schooler could stop a car.

That’s when Keith had the first thought: Maybe Shiro isn’t a regular high schooler.

“Thank you,” Keith said, his voice small and far away. For a split second, Shiro holds him closer to him, a light squeeze that would be hug-adjacent if it weren’t for the conflicted look on his face.

“I have to go,” Shiro said, turning his head away. “Can you walk?”

“Probably,” Keith said. “You saved my life.”

“I must go.”

“Bye, see you around. Drive safely,” Keith added, almost ironically, still glad to have his sense of humor intact.

_Oh my god_ , Keith thought. _I almost died!_


	5. Poker night with dad and dad’s friends

A few days later, it was finally the weekend but then Keith remembered that he didn’t have any friends to hang out with yet even though he had essentially spent his whole science classes talking with Shiro about everything and nothing. Instead, he used the time to call his friends back home and his mom, who was currently abroad in Guatemala. 

In the evening, he was planning on watching a movie but instead his dad’s friends came over to play poker and his dad asked him if he wanted to join in, too.

“Poker is a man’s sport,” said one of his dad’s friends, a fellow engineer named Scott.

“Yeah. Not a sport for creatures,” said another guy named John, who was dressed in a mysterious Patagonia jacket.

“John, what the heck are you talking about?” Keith’s dad asked. Scott also piped in with his own 2 cents, criticizing John’s general attitude.

“Rumors have it that monsters have landed in the harbors of the coast,” he said, entranced by the patterns on the back of the playing cards. “And monsters don’t play card games. They only cheat.”

This was a pretty convincing argument for Keith, but his dad was skeptical enough to challenge the narrative. “John, I really don’t follow what you’re saying here. What kind of monsters?”

“Blood suckers,” John elaborated. “ _Vampires_.”

There was a pregnant silence that drew out as the group soaked up John’s unbelievable words. Where on earth were they coming from? Why did he feel compelled to bring up the subject now? Later, Keith would ask his dad about it but his dad would just shrug and mention that John was the long-time proprietor of a local smoke shop. “Don’t do drugs, Keith,” he said. “Or at least don’t do as many as John, yeah?”

But for whatever strange reason, Keith had felt compelled by that word: vampire. 

He opened an incognito window.


	6. Shiro’s a what ?!?!??!

All the signs pointed to the truth. As Keith scrolled through the search results, his conviction became clearer and clearer. Despite having no physical proof whatsoever, he was one hundred percent certain that Shiro was a vampire. There was no other explanation.


	7. Weekend trip !

During his second and third weeks of school, Keith actually managed to make some friends thanks to joining the engineering club. His specialty was cars, but he really liked Pidge and Hunk who were interested in physics, although he was on the fence about Lance. He wasn’t a bad guy, but man he really got on his nerves with how much he could talk and prattle on about any and everything!

However, none of that mattered: this weekend, his new friends had invited him on a trip to the coast, to civilization! Or at least a place where tourists were and the ocean was, too. Hunk drove because his mom let him borrow the family sedan, which was the most spacious and the safest, he stressed.

“This car is the safest car, crash test dummy guaranteed,” Hunk promised. Then he demonstrated the most important feature of the car, opening one of the doors to reveal ginger ale cans in every possible crevice. “And it’s got a ton of cup holders.”

“Shotgun,” said Pidge.

“No way! I am not sharing the back seat with emo prince Keith!” Lance refuted, climbing into the front seat before Pidge could claim her throne.

Taking the high road, Pidge sighed. “Fine, but I get front seat on the way back,” she shrugged, shacking up in the backseat with Keith. “Plus, I think it’s cool to share a seat with royalty.”

Keith wanted to mumble that he wasn’t that emo, that emo was part of his past. Now he was toeing the line between post-punk grungemuffin and college dropout. He felt that these two fashion styles really underlined the edginess of his personality.

They arrived in the town after a couple hours; it wasn’t too far away at all. Outside, even the sun was shining and it was like a hug from home. Keith felt sick for the cracked deserts and joshua trees, the yearning pulling at his chest like a giant rubber band. Maybe if he got enough resistance, he could slingshot back to his hometown.

They walked the pier, indulging in sweet fairy floss, grilled hot dogs, and rich kettlekorn. There was even a small ferris wheel and they rode that, too. At one point, they found themselves staring over the edge of the dock, watching the jellyfish pump their tentacles toward the surface, then back down. It was mesmerizing, but something about the pale color of their flesh reminded Keith of Shiro. Vaguely, he wished he were here.

“Do y’all know anything about Shiro?”

His three friends shot him an incredulous look that made Keith’s reminiscing smile turn upside-down.

“He’s untouchable,” Lance said. “Like the David statue in the Louvre.”

“That’s exaggerating a little,” Pidge argued. “My brother is friends with him. But he is sort of distant to most people.”

“He’s in my science class,” Keith said. “He’s very kind. We get in trouble for talking in class.”

“Whoa, dude, man,” Hunk said, surprised. “That’s pretty impressive. Shiro is one of those ASB President types. Popular with everyone, but close friends with only a few people. Count yourself lucky.”

Clandestinely, Keith did.

After it got too dark to see the jellies well, they group decided to get some dinner before heading home. Because it was a fun weekend trip, they decided to go to a sit down restaurant, although it was no fancier than a seafood diner. Everybody ordered fish and chips but then Keith’s phone started to ring. It was his dad.

“Be right back, I gotta take this.”

Keith stepped outside, weaved through the crowds and into a quiet alley where he would be able to hear the call. “Hello?”

“Hey Keith, it’s your dad,” his dad said. “I just wanted to check in with you about what time you were getting back. Scott and John and I are going out so I might not be home when you get here.”

“That’s cool, dad. Go out and have a good time with your friends. You work hard.”

“Love you, bud. Be safe.”

“Will do, dad.”

Keith hung up the phone, but his dad’s words were like ill omens, foreshadowing darkness. As he hung up, three figures approached him from within the alley.

“Evening,” one of the men said. Keith said nothing.

“You have bad manners!” Another touted. “Give us your phone!”

“F*** off!” Keith yelled. He wasn’t giving up without a fight.

“Get him!” All of a sudden the three guys came after him. They were a little bigger than him, but the biggest issue was that he was outnumbered. Keith wasn’t bad in a fight but he wasn’t sure he could take on all three men.

“Hey,” came a firm voice. Bulging muscle met reckless punch as Shiro deflected one of the men’s attacks. “Have a deathwish?”

“Shiro?!” Keith called. “What are you doing here?”

“This isn’t worth it guys. Let’s bounce.” The men sauntered off like wounded animals.

“Keith,” Shiro said, turning to him. “Are you okay?”

“Thanks to you,” Keith said, just a whisper of sound. “How did you know to find me here?”

“Something led me to this place. I was out for a drive. Can I take you anywhere you’ll feel safer?”

“Sorry,” Keith started, his heart beating fast as a rabbit’s. “I’m a little shaken up, it’s hard to think straight.”

“Here,” Shiro said, spreading his arms in offering of a hug. Keith obliged him. In Shiro’s rippling arms, he was held tightly, warm and safe. It felt like coming home, like opening the door to the right opportunity. Like watching a sunflower turn to meet the sun.

“Thank you,” Keith said into Shiro’s chest, since he only came up that high. “My friends are inside that restaurant over there getting fish and chips. Would you wanna join us?”

“If that’s okay.”

“Then maybe you could drive me home…?” Keith tried, not wanting to refuse Shiro’s generous, tantalizing offer. The coquettish tone of Keith’s voice made something happy come to life in Shiro’s eyes, and his response was a smile that Keith swore glittered under the lights of the pier.


	8. Together...

Hunk, Pidge, and Lance had certainly been surprised to see Shiro. Neither he nor Keith brought up the incident in the alley way, just that they had stumbled upon each other outside. The rest of the dinner wasn’t too awkward; Shiro was generally good at talking to folks, and he didn’t make Keith feel bad about the way he smelled at any given time. Shiro didn’t eat anything, saying he wasn’t hungry and had eaten on the drive down, so Keith commandeered the table service of french fries for him and Hunk to devour.

They parted ways after that, and while his friends were a little reluctant to see him go home without them, they wanted to encourage his chances for interactions with Shiro. They were a very accepting group of friends, so much so that Keith was starting to believe that it wasn’t so bad to be here after all.

Shiro walked side by side with Keith until they reached his car, a pristine black audi. Keith’s eyebrows drew up in surprise at the quality of the car.

“This is yours?”

“Yep,” Shiro says. “Bought it myself.”

“How?!” Keith asked, shocked at the statement.

“I’ve been saving up for a while,” Shiro shrugged, opening the passenger door for Keith. “And my parents helped me out.”

In his head, Keith did the math and still came up short: even if Shiro had never spent a dime of his birthday money, he still wouldn’t have enough for a car by eighteen. His folks must have been fairly wealthy. Keith wasn’t one to judge though— he was simply impressed.

Inside, the sleek upholstery of the car held Keith in a comfortable embrace, and soon enough Shiro was tearing out of the parking lot and down the town streets toward the nearest highway entry. He was a fast, smooth driver, and before Keith knew it they were well on their way home. They chatted about everything and nothing, from hobbies to extracurriculars to their families. Shiro was also a science-minded guy like Keith, and he had almost ended up joining the airforce. Keith had been on a similar path for a while, thinking he might go to college and then enlist as an officer.

Shiro was easy to talk to, his voice alluring and face pleasant to look at. He kept one hand on the wheel and the other on the console, as if to prompt Keith into acting. Keith was dangerous enough to do so. But he held back for a little longer.

“I wanted to thank you,” Keith said after some time had gone by and their conversation had dwindled for a moment. “For saving my life today and the other day as well.” Shiro tried to downplay it by saying it wasn’t a big deal, that he was standing right there.

“But you weren’t,” Keith challenged, “right there.”

“Keith,” Shiro pressed, his voice a little firmer.

“It was amazing,” Keith said finally. “You don’t have to tell me how you did it.”

“You sound like you already know how,” Shiro said, raising a suspicious yet flirty eyebrow.

“Maybe I do,” Keith shrugged. “Maybe I don’t. But I like you and want to respect your boundaries in this situation, even if it was supernatural.” Keith’s mouth fizzes with the aftershocks from the words leaving his mouth so quickly and unexpectedly. It wasn’t the admission he’d been planning, but it was the one he’d ended up saying.

“Thank you,” Shiro said, voice soft with appreciation. “I like you, too, you know.”

“Oh,” Keith said, truly not having expected any sort of reciprocation, even though he had been so hopeful. “Oh.”

Keith mustered up all his courage and lay his hand over Shiro’s which was still resting on the console between them. Shiro turned his hand over so that their palms faced each other, and soon their fingers were intertwined.

The strangest part was that as this happened, Shiro was pulling into Keith’s driveway.

“We’re here,” Keith said, surprised.

“We are.”

“I lost track of time with you.”

“Thanks for losing it with me,” Shiro said. “Keith, I have a question. Can I… kiss you?”

Keith’s heart began to beat very quickly, and he was sure that Shiro was using his enhanced vampire hearing to listen to it. He nodded, quickly leaning toward Shiro. “Yes.”

They kissed and it was like a tiny star had gone supernova between their lips. Shiro was soft and attentive, gently guiding their kiss from experienced angles and directions. Keith let him lead, happy to be along for the ride.

“I’ll see you at school on Monday,” Keith said.

“If you’re free, we could hang out tomorrow, too. I know some cool trails since you mentioned you like hiking,” Shiro offered.

“Sounds great,” Keith replied, his gaze soft. Getting out of the car was a shock to his system, the outside world so much colder than the warmth of Shiro’s car. Shiro waited until Keith was waving him off from halfway inside the door of his house.

It had been a lovely day.


	9. I know what you are

The next day was a Sunday and the whole world seemed to be holding its breath for Monday. The earth was still and silent, and even as they walked through the woods, all Keith could hear was the occasional drop of rainwater, the quiet peep from a robin, and the crunch of soil beneath his and Shiro’s boots.

They took a seat in an open meadow and as the clouds parted, Shiro’s skin took on a handsome glow. Keith figured his skin care routine was top notch.

“This place is beautiful,” Keith said. “Thank you for taking me here.”

“It’s fun to spend time with you,” Shiro said. “With someone who accepts me for who I am.”

“Gay?”

“That, too.”

“Oh, you mean…”

“Say it.”

“You’re a vampire, aren’t you, Shiro?” Keith said, although it sounded like a question in the end, despite all of his posturing. “That’s how you saved me.”

[](https://imgbb.com/)

“I don’t quite know how you figured it out,” Shiro admitted. “But yes. I don’t drink from humans, though,” he added, clearly something important to him. A former goth, Keith was frankly unbothered either way. “My family is vegetarian, per se.”

“I like you as you are, Shiro,” Keith announced. “Gay, vegetarian, vampire. What’s not to like?”

“I could hurt you,” Shiro quietly admitted, pained by the potential truth. A frisson of danger wiggled up Keith’s spine to his neck, leaving gooseflesh in its trail.

“But you wouldn’t,” Keith knew, standing from his seat in the meadow and joining Shiro, pressing close up against him in a trusting embrace. “That’s not who you are.”

Shiro relinquished a fond sigh, scooping Keith up in his arms as though he were made of paper. He pecked him square on the lips and then swung him around until he was riding piggyback. Keith momentarily indulged in the delight of being tall, then felt his stomach drop as the world raced past them, Shiro running faster than was normal for humans to run at. It was like riding a sexy rollercoaster.

When they got done, Keith couldn’t believe the songlike sound of Shiro’s laughter. He couldn’t believe how in love he was with his vampire boyfriend.

 

THE END…?


End file.
